July 07 Onwards

As a quick summary for those of you who have missed out on the past few blog entries I have written, I am in the middle of travelling through Cambodia in SE Asia at present, and this current entry not only covers the back-end of the 2 weeks that I spent in the Cambodian capital city of Phnom Penh, but it also covers my experiences in the town of Siam Reap as well. (For those of you who are interested, Siam Reap is 300ish km N-NW of Phnom Penh by the way).

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So anyway... where shall I begin?...

Hmmm... well if I were to start writing this in chronological order I suppose... the first thing I did after I spoke to you last involved me paying a visit to a local orphanage as it goes... (actually it was here that I ended up playing football with the future Pele of Phnom Penh which was pretty cool)... but anyway... what a wonderful place it was though... oh and what happy children there were there too...

Moving on back to the rest of my week's adventures for now however... and from this point onwards (ie. after the amazing experience that was the above)... I have to say that it all got a little bit random to say the least I'm afraid...

Firstly there was my visit to a local market with a geeky German tourist who was staying at my hostel, a very innocent-looking girl incidently, who then went on to tell me about the time when she got herself scammed recently in a 64,000 (yes a 64,000!) US Dollar game of Blackjack would you believe (in a Vietnamese bedroom of all places as well!)

Anyway... then after meeting her it turned out that it was time for me to put the world to rights with a strange nurse from Oz of course, a rather odd character who turned out to be obsessed with trying to cannulate himself in a very drunken state, so that he could then try to inject himself with the job-lot of vitamins he had on him (erm... why not just have a fruit-shake instead mate?!)...

But finally though, and on top of rubbing shoulders with these colourful characters may I add, I then had the nice surprise of finding myself being invited to my hostel-owner's 2 year-old son's birthday party as well! Talk about living the high-life, eh?!

Well I never!... And what a strange night that blossomed into!...

Ha ha!... as a quick introduction to this weird and wonderful evening actually... let's just say that it didn't really turn out to be your normal "let's play pass-the-parcel, let's get a magician round" toddler-type occasion (as any normal person would imagine it to be anyway)... as instead (by the time some rich Western tourists took over the planning part of it)... it actually ended up becoming more of a whisky-swilling, pig-eating type scoff-fest that was being held at a posh German Hoghouse...

Bless the locals who went there though... as the poor guys didn't have a clue what to do when the mammoth portions of European nosh came out onto the table... whole knobs of butter were being eaten in one go... slices of bread were being picked up to be eaten with forks... sausages were being stared at like they were aliens... meat was being put into people's mouths with knives... etc... etc... etc... (in fact, at one point even, the poor child whose birthday it was actually started to throw-up everywhere because of all the rich food it was eating!)...

Anyway... hmmm... back to speaking about my travels I guess... and my main mission for the back end of this week was for me to visit the ruins of Angkor...

Have you heard of them?

Well as a quick introduction for those of you who haven't... they are all that remains of a settlement that was originally built during the period between 9th-15th century A.D.

Ha ha! The thing is, I don't know if the kings of this time were having a competition with each other as to who could build the biggest, most elaborate buildings for the gods to live in by the way... but anyway... they ended up becoming the nucleus of what you could say ended up being a very large built-up area indeed (in fact some say that they formed the central part of the biggest preindustrial city in the world with a sprawl of 1,150 square miles would you believe)...

Onto the present moment however... and the main remains of which are now mostly situated in an area that starts 5km north of the town of Siam Reap, which incidently is where I am staying now...

Oh, and more importantly I suppose... after all the recent goings on in Cambodia... and as you travel round the country now... it soon becomes apparent that they are in fact the main source of national pride for the locals, as a symbol of the main "Angkor Wat" ruin (which is the world's largest religious building incidently) appears practically everywhere over here... on the national flag... on the local currency... on the national beer label...

Moving on though... and what did I personally make of these ancient ruins when I went to see them earlier on during the week?

Ha ha! Well if the truth be known... I went to visit them with high expectations and I still came away impressed.

Three days of hiring a cycle, getting away from the crowds and exploring some of the most awe-inspiring (and oldest) man-made buildings I have ever seen...

It's been a magical experience, it really has.

Further to this however... and I know that it's not really my place to go on about the history of the ruins and all the religious stuff that goes with them here really... but even so... what I will say on the matter is that it does all go on to make pretty interesting reading as it goes... especially when you consider the fact that one or two of the 12th century pastimes of this country (that are represented on some of the carvings at these places) are now in fact being exported to the Western world as being products of their richer neighbour perhaps...

Anyway...

I'll shut up now!

But before I go though... here are 5 of my favourite photos of the past few days for you to enjoy...

Speak soon ;o)

Do you remember me telling you about that local guy I got introduced to at the very end of my last blog entry (the one who was going to take me to a local food place for a few cheap beers?)

Well I ended up meeting up with him the following night as it goes, and so as a result I suppose you could say that I had what turned out to be a very good time of it indeed...

Ha ha!... Actually... speaking of which... and it was pretty much fun from the word go really, as at the start of the evening he decided to take me over to visit his house on stilts would you believe... (in order for me to meet his wife and his children... oh and his big pet goldfish which he was keen for me to see as well of course!)...

Anyway... it was here that a few of us sat down to watch an episode of Tom and Jerry for a short while (as I was being invited to a wedding later on during the week may I add!)... before my new friend then went on to take me and his youngest son to the restaurant he had been telling me about, which was over on the other side of town...

In short though... what a nice guy he was... oh and what good English he spoke too... in fact it was as a result of his English speaking ability (and his own natural willingness I suppose) that he was able to tell me some very interesting stories about his life to say the least (being a 38 year-old Cambodian meant that he had been through quite a bit)...

Moving on to this place he took me to for now however...

And wow!...

To be fair... well... as soon as we got there, the evening was made up of the stuff that a traveller can only dream of really I guess... as whether I be eating a dish full of snake whilst chewing on 1-inch bugs... or I be drinking jugs of Angkor Beer whilst listening to this guy tell me his life story... or I even be having play-fights with his son whilst trying to fend off the street sellers who were coming up to our table every 5 minutes or so... I suppose you could say that all of my senses were working overtime throughout the whole experience, and that I was loving every single minute of it...

Ha ha... at one point in fact I was even told the social rules for drinking alcohol out here which was quite entertaining...

Apparently in some parts of society in Cambodia, when you raise a glass to say "cheers" to anybody who is older than you or who has more social status than you, you have to place your left hand on the inside of your right elbow as a sign of respect... oh and then (rather interestingly)... when you actually say cheers in their language (which on average seems to be every 2 minutes or so)... you have to be very careful with the translation you are taught- as one small slip of the tongue and you can actually be saying the Cambodian version of the "F" word instead!

Anyway... and despite learning the above... my own natural courtesy did prevent me from getting too much of an insight as to what this guy had actually lived through during the past 4 decades however... but even so... I definately got the picture that his life in Phnom Penh now is a world away from his life in the 1970's (when he lost most of his close family in the countryside in very unfortunate circumstances)... and as a result it ended up proving to be a very interesting night out for me.

Moving on though... and, to be fair, it's been quite an interesting week in general really... as in-between my mate at the guesthouse taking me to his gym for some lessons each day (for the continuation of my mini-holiday-of-pain which I have been loving every single minute of!)... well I suppose you could say that I have taken it upon myself to be a bit of a tourist geek as well!... I've been looking through the markets, I've been reading my books... then there have been the monuments I have been to visit, the national museum, the temple the city is named after... etc, etc, etc... so there has been quite a lot for me to see and do...

Actually... on the subject of the main temple here... it is situated in quite a nice setting really, as it is up on a small peaceful hill-type island that is situated in the middle of a busy roundabout.

Ha ha! In fact, it was on this island that I managed to get the picture of the monkey that I have attached above as well... there were loads of them running about the place which was pretty cool.

Having said this though, there was the sad story of the lonesome elephant who lived at the bottom of the hill there, whose mate (according to one of the locals I met here) decided to pop his clogs recently because he got bored of walking round and round the roundabout with him all day long!

Anyway... and the main thing I have found since I have been here in Phnom Penh (when I compare it to the places I have just been to) is just how easy it has been for me to get around and do stuff.

I think this has been mainly due to the fact that most of the locals I have met here have had the ability to speak at least a little bit of English perhaps really, because it has been as a result of this I have found that the simple things (such as asking for food for example) have been a lot easier for me to do, which has been nice...

Oh and on top of this *most of* the people here have also been really kind and welcoming towards me as well (especially at my guesthouse). *At this point please notice the words "most of" in my last sentence though... as I did happen to meet a few rude misfits during the past few days... the first of whom in fact ran the visa place I had to go to earlier on during the week as it goes...

Ah... the trumped-up office I had to use was a bit of a one-man-band really... as it seemed to me to be the sort of institution that was run by just one very important looking middle-aged man, who (what with his very big ego) seemed to me to be a bit of an institution himself perhaps...

Ha ha! I won't go into the ins and outs of this silly fella too much... but basically let's just say that after him being so rude to me on the occasions such as when he didn't even have the decency to lend me a pen, he then put me into a situation whereby I had to accept a visa receipt from him that was 10 US Dollars short of the amount he had taken from me (with the reason being that "10 US Dollar is for me [him]").

Erm... I don't think so mate!

Well... You wanted to see the pair of us!

Back and forth we argued... In front of other people as well! (I am pleased to say that I never raised my voice with him during our heated discussion... but even so... I did find it all quite a bit embarrassing as you can probably well imagine!)

Ha ha!... I did manage to get my money back eventually however (first 5 US Dollars, and then the full 10 when he saw that I wasn’t going to back down)... but that wasn’t the point really I feel... as I wonder how many other people he has tried to bully money out of as a result of him using (what the Cambodians may refer to in slang as) a "bonjour" type of way of doing things in the past?

The people we meet, eh?!

To be fair though... as bad a person as he was... he wasn't a patch on the 2 guys from Down-Under who I met later on during the week...

Talk about God’s Gift Gone Wrong!

Alpha-Male pride mixed in with a good old fashioned dose of beer muscles as well (as my mate Mike would say!).

Anyway... these guys were much older than me and they should have known better really. In fact in summing them up quickly... they were the type of people who make the effort to “travel” around the world to see the sites... only to then do none other than get rip-roaring p1ssed right next to them once they get there (whilst blessing the people around them with their ignorance at the same time of course)... Nice one!

Don’t get me wrong though, I’m up for a good time like any lad my age is, of course I am... but these boys? Well usually I can suss out peoples humour and I can generally make acceptions if it isn’t in line with my own (especially if there is drink involved)... but anyway... after “Pom” this and “Pom” that over and over (and over) again, it was just too much for me this time really...

If you can imagine the scene for a moment... a busy table... me sat down with some of the locals whilst talking to a nice French girl... and then these 2 wallys sat at the end of it as well- with one of them saying out loud the following... (my own thoughts are in brackets by the way)...

"I don't usually sit at the same table as a Pom..." (Give me an R)
"So I guess I will have to go and move tables..." (Give me an O)
"Do you know what I did to the last Pom I met?" (Give me a Y)
"I shook his hand whilst saying 'thanks for sending me to Australia!'" (Give me an O)
"You Pom's don't play proper sports such as Australian Rules Football like we do..." (Give me an L)
"You play a girlie game called 'wuss-ball' instead (what we Australians call soccer)..." (Sorry we don't play 'soccer' in England... but anyway... Give me a P)
"Ah... we're all the same really 'Bro'..." (I'm not your 'Bro'... Give me an L)
"You bleed red just like me!..." ...accompanied by a wrist-slitting gesture of course... (Give me a U)
"Ah... you're ok for a Pom you..." (Give me an M)

Yes. He was indeed being a right Royal Plum.

To be fair they were both bang out of order as it goes. Ha ha! This was so much so in fact, that at one point later on in the evening, another English guy who was at the receiving end of one of their comments looked as though he wanted to send them flying into this time next week!

Me though? Well I just sat back and watched them get more and more drunk as the hours wore on, before they then went on to make absolute fools out of themselves at the end of the evening, by doing none other than arguing with each other about a prostitute in front of some of the local people...

How satisfying it was for me to see them do this! (As you probably well know... the fine Far Eastern art of keeping face should be the one thing that you should at least try to take away with you from this part of the world maybe!)

Anyway... (and I promise I’ll get off my soap box now!)... back to my travels...

Well... I've been in Phnom Penh for 2 weeks now... and I have to say that despite meeting the likes of the above, I have loved every minute of my stay here, oh and I have made some really good friends here as well as it goes... but even so... my onward visa is sorted now... and so if the truth be known it is time for me to move on really... before I begin to grow roots in this strange city I am in (there is some weird stuff that goes on here you know!)...

So... my next destination?

Tomorrow morning I aim to travel 300ish km in a north-westerly direction in order to visit the town of Siam Reap; literal translation "Defeat of Siam" (today's Thailand)... quite a choice name, eh?!

It is meant to be a very nice, very touristy place indeed... but anyway... once I get there the main plan is for me to then go and lose myself for a few days in a place nearby that is considered to be (in some people's eyes at least) one of the greatest man-made Wonders of the World...

Bring it on!

I'd better get back to my guesthouse and start packing my bag for now though...

Speak soon ;o)

(THIS BLOG ENTRY HAS BEEN SPLIT INTO TWO PARTS)

As a quick update for those of you who haven't read my last couple of blogs, approximately two weeks ago I left the country of Laos and I moved southwards into Cambodia via the land-border crossing.

When I spoke to you last I was in the Cambodian town of Kampong Cham, and I was roughly 3/4's of the way through the 500ish km road-transport journey which was taking me from the Laos/Cambodian border through to the Cambodian capital of Phnom Penh (in the southern area of Cambodia).

This entry starts on on the next part of my journey, this being the short trip from Kampong Cham to a place called Spidertown, a small settlement which was located less than 50km down the road... (although at this point I must say that to call it a town as such is perhaps a little bit misleading really, as it seemed to me to be just a scattering of buildings which were situated on and around the junction of Cambodia's Highways 6 and 7 when I was there... but anyway...)

The place they call Spidertown... and despite me finding myself being sat on the fence as to whether I actually liked it or not when I first got to this strange small community, I must admit that I did find myself being quite nervously excited as I was walking the streets anyway, as it was here that I was hoping to attempt to eat my first ever tarantula-looking spider (an idea which was sold to me by 2 guys from the US who I met whilst I was staying in Kampong Cham)...

Ha ha... as the story goes, after about an hour of searching the market area once I got there, it actually ended up being quite comical when I came across my first spider seller (or "Spiderwoman" as I called her)... as I will be the first to admit that upon seeing the size of the monsters that she had cooked up and was trying to sell on the tray she was holding, I soon became very close to bottling it and walking straight on!

Needless to say I did stop to buy one though, and I am pleased to say that, true to my word, the palm-sized hairy scary tarantula-type thing that was placed into my hand at the point of sale soon became a crunchy, chewy thing in my mouth, which (strangely enough) actually turned out to be easier for me to digest than what I had previously thought... (although having said this I must admit that I did have a funny point later on in the day whilst looking down at my stomach and imagining a big spider inside of me!)...

Ha ha... What a strange thing to do eh?! Actually... before I move on, here are some pictures for you to see if you like...

So anyway... one overnight stay in Spidertown and then it was an early rise for me the following morning, as I then made my way over to the main junction there in order to arrange getting some transport to the capital city of Phnom Pehn (which incidently is where I am writing this now)...

And... wow... what a place!

You see... whether I be walking down a street here where there is the odd fake 100 US Dollar bill or 2 laying about... or I be speaking to a man whilst he is showing me a bullet wound on his thigh from when he got shot by the Khmer Rouge...

And further to this... whether I be walking (quite literally) on the remains of human bones and clothes that exist on the sight of a 1970s killing field here... or I be hearing the odd gun shot being fired off in the air during the day... or I even just be paying attention to the fact that there was a forced mass exodus of people from this capital only 3 decades ago (when most of the population here had to work in the countryside and the whole area turned into a ghost town)...

I think it is pretty fair to say that all of the above make it quite a thought-provoking city indeed.

Add on top of this the fact that (up until I had arrived in Phnom Penh) most of the 21 different places I had slept at during the previous 47 days just so happened to be of the few-thousand populated, dust-layered, one-street long settlement variety...

And I suppose you could say that now I am in a capital city with over one-million inhabitants, with it's busy (busy, busy!) streets that are lined with big important looking buildings (ie. the kind of non-descript things which I as a Westerner associate as being an integral part of a normal town or city)... there is a familiar kind of buzz to the place as well.

Anyway... I think that the general travelling concensus for Phnom Penh's visitors is to use it for what it is... Use it's history to put your own life into perspective... use it's markets for the bartering... and use it's bars for the partying...

Quite a simple formula really... although why I am not sticking to it I do not know... as if the truth be known I've still not yet given myself the opportunity to decide which is better... Laos' Beer Lao or Cambodia's Angkor Beer on the party front side of things since I've been here... and you could say that I've found a quiet kind of peace in the city instead, this being on the balcony of my guesthouse where I find myself getting lost for hours on end whilst reading books to do with the history of this strange country that I am in...

Onto the funny stuff anyway... and well there's not been too much of it around this week really I'm afraid... but having said this though, the locals have been making me laugh with their funny sense of humour at times... In fact, to be honest, I don't know what it is that turns them into comedians when they find out that I am from the UK... but all I can say on the matter is that I do actually find some of their responses quite in line with my sort of wit as it goes...

Ha ha!... Firstly I had one of them tell me that he knew Tony Blair and that he was a good man (in a very serious, well-pronounced voice may I add)... oh, and then if this wasn't enough... not only did I have another one tell me that the UK is "spot on" (how much of a home expression is that?!)... but I also had yet another one tell me that the country of England is none other than "lovely jubbly" as well!

Aside from these strange characters I have managed to make friends with a local lad around my age who works at the guesthouse I've been staying at though, and he has been kind enough to invite me along to his boxing club during the evenings which has been nice.

Actually... speaking of which... and what a set up!... (what exactly I am doing in a boxing-club here I do not know... but hey, in my defence... it's Cambodia... and pretty much anything goes in this mad country really- so why not eh?!)

Anyhow... to be fair, the gym (or the "Sweat Pit" as I refer to it due to the 35C, 48% humidity in the city at the moment) is absolute chaos inside, and it is exactly like the hustle you see out on the street here (except in more of a gym-club type format of course)... so I suppose you could say that it is quite an exciting environment for me to be in to say the least...

Oh and the main thing that I like about the place? Well it basically concerns the fact that (in true Cambodian style of course)... the golden rule that people stick to whilst training there is... "to not pay any tuition money to the people on the front desk who run the gym, as they will charge you too much money"... and instead the advice given on the matter is that... "if you sneak the odd 1 or 2 US Dollars to him, him or him"... (ie. the 3 guys who wander about in the main training area of an evening)... "you will get much better training for much less money"...

Ha ha... Of course... why didn't I think of that one before?!

All good fun eh?! (Actually... I wonder if the gyms at home do a similar type of deal?!)

Back to my travelling anyway... and I am having to stay here in Phnom Penh for a short while at the moment in order to sort out some visa stuff on my passport.

This is no big shame really though, because (as you would have probably guessed already) I do really like the place... oh and what with the big open boulevards here, the nice riverside area, the big open parks and the few tourist attractions that are scattered about the city... there is quite a bit of stuff for me to be getting stuck into seeing as well.

Ha ha! Actually... on the subject of tourist attractions... yesterday I managed to visit the big palace here, and even though there was only a small part of it that was open to visitors, the area that I did manage to see did turn out to be quite impressive as it goes (the throne room, the room with the silver floor, etc, etc)...

Anyway... the funny bit came as I was standing on my own in the middle of a posh courtyard there (in the middle of a baking hot afternoon may I add)... and, if I remember correctly, I was trying to make out what on earth this (I don’t know- 10 metres high maybe?) big stone thing was in front of me at the time, when I suddenly saw this European looking guy of around my age come marching over towards me...

To be fair, he was the sort of person who I would normally just look at and admire from a distance really (as he kind of had an aura of strangeness about him to say the least), but on this particular occasion however, the fact that he was making a direct beeline for me kind of made me feel that I was just about to be treated to one of life's strange social encounters maybe...

So... he marched up to me didn't he (why he chose me of all people I do not know)... and with no introduction at all, he soon went on to tear the whole 10 metre-high stone thing that lay in front of us apart of course, in an explosive speech that, looking back on it, had the same sort of passion and dedication in it as the conversations that I have at home whilst I am up the pub with my mate Lung Man (when we are discussing the likes of the Foo Fighters, Queen and Led Zep over a pint of Carlsberg or 3)...

I was told about the contrasts... the Hinduism... the Buddhism... Cambodia... the Sub-Continent... the angry stone carved men... the peaceful Buddha... in fact it is fair to say that I got the full narrative history of the stone thing in one minute flat... oh and then after which, the font-of-all-knowledge just simply decided to walk off and disappear!

Ha ha!... I was that overcome by what had just happened that I forget if we even said goodbye to each other... and all I remember is that before I knew it he had gone (and he was probably over at the other end of the courtyard whilst admiring some other cultural icon or ancient relic he had found)...

What a legend. eh?!

Anyway... and the whole point of me meeting him?

Ah, I don't know really... as if the truth be known... at the time I was only visiting a palace (which was something in my mind that was only at the very edge of what is turning out to be a great experience for me here)...

But for him? Well for him this place seemed to be the centre of his universe... and as a result he was loving it being there just as much as what I was loving it a couple of years ago when I saw the Foo's play at Hyde Park and Brian May and Roger Taylor came out to join them on stage...

And it was further to this (and it was as a result of me meeting him I suppose) that I kind of appreciated being out here on my travels even more... whilst at the same time feeling just a little bit homesick for my family and my mates for the first time since I had been away since last July as well...

Weird I know... but it was a good feeling for me to have though...

Ha ha... the stuff I write in this blog eh?!

Rock on anyway...

Oh and on the subject of rocking on... I had that guy who I spoke about earlier (the one who was shot in the leg by the KR) come up to me again yesterday saying that he wanted to go out and share a 3-pint jug of beer with me sometime...

Time to have that drink now me thinks!

Spot on!

Speak soon ;o)

When I spoke to you last (which was when I was on the 4,000 Island complex in southern Laos), my original plan was to get up early the following morning in order to catch a boat over to the mainland... for me to then walk the 20km down to the Laos/Cambodia border and... ahhh... I'll stop here for the moment... (I must warn you that this following bit is probably a bit too boring to read though)... but anyway... here we go...

Hmmm... so where do I start?

Well firstly I think that it is best for me to explain to you the land border crossing procedure between Laos and Cambodia before I go any further, and I feel that the quickest and easiest way for me to do so is to give you the sort of advice that I picked up from a couple of travel books on this matter... (and this kind of went something as follows)...

"... fellow traveller it is an unoffical crossing point that you are going to use... so you must expect to pay a bribe fee to the uniformed officials on both sides... oh and ps. further to this... for your information... it actually consists of 2 crossing points which are several kilometres away from each other as well... (one of these is a road crossing and the other one is a river crossing... but if I were you I would use the river crossing- as the road at the border is in a very bad state of repair)..."

Anyway... in a nut shell and back to what I was saying above... the day after I spoke to you last... and my idea was to get up early in the morning in order to walk the 20ish km down to the Laos/Cambodia border to the RIVER crossing... where I would then hope to be able to flash my passport and pay a couple of bribes (whilst smiling nicely at the guards on the border)... before being able to kick back and relax on a 55km riverboat journey which would take me down to the Cambodian town of Stung Treng...

And as the story goes... the walk itself down to the border was ok actually... well the scenery wasn't the greatest (in fact the most distinctive thing that I saw in 20km of walking turned out to be a half-naked lady with most of her skin peeling off who was talking out loud to herself in the middle of nowhere)... but despite this... things did seem to get a little more interesting as I approached the border though, as it was here that I found out that there were no longer any boats available for me to catch at the river crossing anymore!...

Ha ha... Actually... would you believe that it ended up taking three local people to stop and tell me the the old: "No boat to Cambodia now. Chinese Team fix road between Laos and Cambodia very quickly. Everyone now use road..." vital info I needed to know before I stopped and took any notice of what was being said?!

So anyway... back to my travels... (and what with Mr lonely Planet's "use the river crossing" advice proving to be as much use to me as what a chocolate teapot would be may I add)... I then decided to make use of the local knowledge I had just received by starting to make my way over to where the ROAD crossing was, as I had walked past the junction that lead to which half an hour before...

Complicated or what eh?!

And moving on... (oh, and in order to speed things up as I didn't know what time the road crossing actually closed as well)... 5 minutes after I changed direction I was on the back of a motorcycle which was being ridden by somebody who doubled up as the local policeman and con-artist rolled into one...

Ten minutes later and I was at the Lao road border checkpoint whilst smiling at an important looking man in uniform (who was imitating my English accent whilst I was paying him my bribe fee)...

And then a further 30 minutes after that I was across the border and it was a good old fashioned case of "Welcome to Cambodia"!

Ha ha!... Well something like that anyway... Hmmm... let's just say that it was a cool reception that I received when I first entered Cambodia, and that my initial impression of this new country I was in was that it actually seemed to have a pulse which I could feel (this was something that I found hard to detect during my time in Laos)...

(Oh... and not that this is to do with my own travelling... but with regards to the strangeness that goes on at this particular border crossing [and I took this story from another traveller from the UK at face value myself]... a day after I crossed this border, a coachload of tourists used it, and one of whom just so happened to be a national from Nigeria who- when he tried to sort out his visa on the border- was actually given one which started and expired on that same particular day- this meaning that he couldn't actually enter the country because his visa had expired as soon as it started... so his only option was to buy a further visa at a massive cost of 300 US Dollars)...

Back to my story anyway... so I was at the Laos/Cambodian Border on the Cambodian side... and there was the Cambodian official's shed behind me with the man sat in it who just stared at me and said "No!" when I asked him if he spoke any English... there was the stretch of tarmac in front of me which went on for 55km of nothingness until it reached the nearest local town (Stung Treng)... oh and there was an old shed to the right of me which had a sort of... well... 1ft x 2ft dried out moat around it and about 3 locals (1 fella, 2 girls- all around my age) and a couple of dogs who were all staring at me...

Oh well... no harm in trying eh?!...

"Speak English?" I shouted out to them as I looked over to my right...

A short silence followed... then after which my question was acknowledged by the man of the group as he shouted out a "Yes!" answer (which in turn was followed by a loud splurt of local language and a laughter session with the 2 girls [that was presumably about me and at my expense])... but anyway...

"You know how I get to Stung Treng?" I then proceeded to ask the guy as I made my way over to a makeshift plank which bridged the moat around his house...

"Yes- Me! 40 Dollar." he shouted out loudly whilst laughing...

I started to walk away

"Ok then... 30 Dollar..." he shouted out.

I was still walking at this point... so he then asked me to turn around and step onto the mini-island he appeared to be on in order for us to discuss (what eventually turned out to be) a way much cheaper price...

Ok. Anyway... now I'm sat down at this place, what appeared to be this guy's house I mean... and not that this description is any means derogatory about his living environment at all- not in the slightest- I am just writing this to let you know what it was like there...

Wasps. Loads of them. Everywhere.
Flies. Loads of them. Everywhere.
Raw food with files on it. Loads of it.
Junk. Loads of it. Everywhere.
2 underfed dogs.
2 underfed cats.
1 very unhappy looking duck who was chewing a plastic looking thing.
A handful of some of the most unhealthy looking chickens I had ever seen.
Wet gunk on the floor ?What? Loads of it. Almost everywhere.

And this guy? Well he was the sort of guy who dresses up smart for no reason...

What on earth I was doing here of all places asking him of all people for his help I do not know... but what I can say in my defence on this matter is that it was a very interesting situation for me to be in, and that it was a very enjoyable experience at the time...

Anyway... we discussed how much I was going to pay him for my lift and pretty soon we were off... oh and at this point I won't even go into the state of the car we were in... but let's just say that it is a miracle that the thing started up at all... this being even more the case when you consider the fact that it just so happened to have a 6ft stick tied to the back of it which was being used to tow another car as well...

So we set off... and to be fair (credit where credit is due) I have to say that the car did better than what I thought it would... and even though it only reached a top speed of around 30kmph on the straight... I think that it managed to last a whole distance of about 20km before I managed to smell that distinctive electrical burning smell... a further 1km before I saw smoke coming out from the front of it... oh and then a further 100m before the guy driving the car had to shout out to his mate in the car behind that he was going to have to do an emergency stop (as this was presumably the point when he started to see some flames maybe)...

Needless to say... it was at this point (through using the simple formula "Car+Smoke+?Flames= Not Good")... that I then decided to get out of the car... and I was glad to see that the driver also had the sense to get out of it too... who in turn was followed by his front seat passenger... oh and also his mate in the car behind who got out of his own car as well...

So... Three guys who were dressed up smart for no reason... One guy who was in his scruffy travelling gear... All out on a road in the middle of nowhere in baking hot Cambodia whilst looking at each other with our arms in the air (and glancing over at the occasional flame which was poking it's head out from under one of the front wheel arches of a car that, to be fair, should have been put on the scrap pile 10 years ago)...

You wanted to see the state of us... Well you wanted to see the state of guy who's car it was really, as despite the fact that his car was starting to set alight, there was no stress on his face whatsoever... (and instead in fact, he was just looking at me whilst grinning the type of grin I would give to one of my mates if we were on our way to a nightclub back at home and we had got a flat tyre or something)...

Anyway... he started to throw gravel at the wheel arch where the flames were coming from.

I stepped back.

He then threw even more gravel at the wheel arch where the flames were coming from.

So I then stepped back even further and I handed him one of the waters out of my rucksack... when at which point one of his mate's ran across the road to go to the toilet may I add... oh and then the other one decided to flag down none other than a big dumper truck as well...

Two minutes later and I was on the dumper truck being offered a cigarette by a man who liked to whistle while he worked... and then half-an-hour later I was getting off the truck on the outskirts of the town of Stung Treng (which is where I wanted to be in the first place).

What a bizarre day.

To be honest I don't think that I could even make something like that up!

(Oh- and what on earth happened to the burning car I do not know...)

So... the town of Stung Treng... and... well... there wasn't a lot around to keep me there really...

I had a bedroom with the odd cockroach or two... there was a market square with three overturned car wrecks on it... there were lots of men walking about wearing either pork pie hats or over-sized baseball caps... and apart from that there was not a lot else to see... well apart from there being lots of banners which were advertising something called "Muscle Wine" that is...

Oh... having said this though (and why I am including this in my blog I do not know)... but upon my decision to leave early the following morning... as I made my way over to the central parking lot in order to agree a deal on some transport to take me to the town of Kratie for that day (and thus continue my travels in a southerly direction)... I don't know if there was a car accident on a street corner which was about 150 metres from where I was standing or something (I never heard a bang myself)... but I did happen to witness the sight of about 20 locals stop whatever it was that they were doing dead in their tracks, to gasp, gawk and then run over to the street corner itself and pick up around 30 x 1ft fish that were flapping about in the road...

I guess that you had to be there really... but it was quite funny to watch though... as where on earth the fish came from I do not know (were they flying fish that fell out of the sky or something?!)

Anyway... 2 hours later and I was at the town of Kratie...

Thank you very much!

Good accommodation... a good vibe... a kind local man who gave me an impromptu language lesson... a riverside location where I could sit and practise what he taught me... oh and it just so happened that I could people watch there whilst reading the book "Cambodia Year Zero" as well...

Actually... on the subject of which... and W-O-W. I can't help but look at the local people here who are from the generation of that above me now and begin to think what they have seen or been through during their lifetimes...

Back to the travelling though... and after spending a day and a half at Kratie I then continued in my southwards direction by catching a bus to the town of Kampong Cham (which according to my Mr Lonely Planet was a place that would be nothing more than a "transport hub which I "wouldn't want to spend more than one afternoon in")...

Hmmm ok then...

Well... even though the town itself does so happen to have the first cashpoint that I have seen in the best part of two weeks... maybe it's busy, messy, decaying state does perhaps hint at the fact that it doesn't really cater for tourism as such, yes... but even so... I must admit that the whole "stay there for half a day" thing actually turned out to be something which I couldn't get my head around when I got here at first... and it is as a result of this that I am still at this strange place two days later...

And the stuff that has been here for me to do?

Well... during the afternoon that I got here 2 days ago I managed to wander across a bamboo bridge in order to visit an island which had one of the most natural farming communities I have ever seen (horse drawn carts... haystacks... people getting water from wells... etc... etc...)... and then on top of this... yesterday I also managed to cycle a 56km ish round-trip in order to visit an important local village where there were two hills to be seen, one called "Boy" and the other called "Girl"... (so if the truth be known... there is no way that I could have fitted this all into one afternoon really is there Mr LP?...)

Anyway... about the 2 hills village place that was in the middle of nowhere (well it was just off Cambodia's Highway Number 71 really)... and what a strange place it was for me to visit...

Having said this though, once I got there I did have the bonus of having an English speaking local show me round for free which was nice... as this in turn meant that I could not only be shown the right way to go up the hills... but I could also be shown the wrong way to go down them as well! (Ie. through some bushes and through a small field of fruit trees which had some angry sounding dogs guarding it!)

Oh... and the whole point of cycling out to this village? Ok... well I don't go chasing temples (sorry- they are called "wats" in this part of the world)... but even so... I do have to admit that there were a few to be seen on and around these hills... oh and I just so happened to wake up a ?"monk"? who was asleep in a pagoda at one of them on the top of "Girl Hill" as well, although his overall demeanour did make him seem to me to be more your average rock and roll mosh pit fan than he was anything to do with Buddism...

Ha ha! Moving on though... and I have to say that after reading a little bit about what went on in the 1970's, it was the Khmer Rouge killing fields that lay at the bottom of "Boy Hill" that was the main thing that interested me during my visit there... it's not right that I talk about it here though... but I must say that it did all feel a bit eerie at the time... contrasts... etc... etc...

So... anyway... it was a good day out... especially when you add onto this the fact that I got stopped by some locals on my way back in order to have some frog on a stick that was washed down with some palm tree wine that is!...

Ha ha... What a mad place this is eh?...

I've been here for 4 days now and I still can't get my head around it!

All I can say is that it is pretty good fun being here so far though... but I must admit that in order to do things properly I am going to have to go now in order to try and find myself a better guidebook to help me make the most of my time here...

Oh... by the way I can tell you one thing about this country for sure... and that is that some of the local women I have seen here seem to be more flirty than the men who were women that I came across whilst I was in Laos! (To be fair this does actually take some beating!) Ha ha!

Anyway... speak soon ;o)

PS. I'm not too sure on how you can access my albums on this site, but the internet rate was quite cheap here so I was finally able to add my Moscow photos, and if you are interested them they are in an album called "Russia".

The last and final part of my journey through Laos took me from the town of Pakse to the complex of 4,000 Islands (via the ancient capital of Champasak) in an adventure that proved to be very beautiful, very historic and very (very) hot indeed.

Pakse itself was a strange old place... and with lots of rich Chinese hotel owners... (lots of neon)... lots of backpackers... oh and lots of women with big feet (ie. man size feet)... I have to say that it wasn't the most inspiring of places to be in at all... but having said this I did find it quite funny to sit back and observe the crossroads state it was at for a day or two though...

In fact it was here that I met a fellow healthcare worker who came in the shape of a nurse from Germany as well...

Ha ha!... if the truth be known she was a nice girl actually... but even so... how on earth I kept a straight face when she told me the story of her being in a beachside hut on a beach in southern Thailand recently with the floor collapsing beneath her during the night I do not know!

She wasn't the smallest thing bless her, and the fact that she actually got stuck in the floorboards with some French tourists having to rescue her (with her sarong falling off as well may I add...) meant the whole thing sounded like something out of a Carry On film really!

So anyway... after Pakse... one short 35km diversion and one ferry ride later I was at the town of Champasak... and even though it was here that I rubbed shoulders with the likes of a Swiss Man who happened to have short arms and long pockets... oh and also Mr Tactful as well (he came in the shape of a guy from the big English speaking country who not only took great pleasure in telling me that "the UK is miserable, grey and depressing"... but he also told me that "you [I] look like a homeless person on that bicycle" too)... I am pleased to say that I did actually really enjoy my stay at this small historical place.

It was so small in fact that it only consisted of one street bless it... but even so... it was it's riverside location and the ancient temple ruins that were 10km down the road that gave it my vote... and as a result it ended up being a very nice overnight stay for me indeed.

The following day... one ferry journey and 107km of cycling later I was where I really wanted to be though... this being Don Khong Island... (well I was sat alongside 2 Croatian motorcyclists looking across at it anyway)...

Five minutes later I was on my second ferry of the day however... and it was this that took me and these motorcyclists across to the main town there (which is where I had originally planned my cycling journey to come to an end).

Ha ha! Actually on the subject of the Croatians... what with their long hair flapping in the wind/dark shades type combo and the white crepe material suit which one of them happened to be wearing... I must admit that they seemed to me to look like the sort of characters who would have been friends with Eyeball Paul out of Kevin and Perry Go Large when I met them at first...

After speaking to them for a while though I must admit that they did turn out to be really nice blokes as it goes... and that I did in fact end up having quite a laugh with them whilst the sun was setting at a riverside restaurant that evening...

Moving on... and island life eh?!

The locals here are so laidback they are nearly falling over backwards... the travellers here are sat next to the river just generally doing nothing all day... the meals arrive an hour after ordering them... the only traffic on the roads appears to be the water buffalo... and the only engines I can hear anything of in fact seem to come from the occasional misfire of the small wooden boats which are sailing down the Mekong River...

So far I have managed to visit 3 islands in total... and home for me at the moment is a bungalow on stilts which is made of bamboo and has no electricity... my bathroom is a shed across the way where lots of spiders and lizards live... oh and I have a balcony with a hammock on it which overlooks the river...

All in all it is fair to say that it is pretty much spot on really!... (This is especially the case when I compare it to the last place I stayed at as well... where one of the blokes who worked there tried to tactically hide/nick my trainers from me may I add!)

Anyway... I have only got a couple of days left on my visa here before I have to move on... so for now I will have leave you and get back to making the most of my hammock I'm afraid... but before I do go though... as what has been the most fun part of my travels draws to a close... I have managed to put together 10 strange facts about my trip round Laos with a toilet for you to read below...

Speak soon ;o)

****

1) Total number of kilometres I cycled: 755
2) Highest number of consecutive roadside High 5's I received at any one particular time: 4
3) Total net cost of buying and selling a bike, buying and selling a second bike, buying tools and the odd roadside repair: Approx. 40 UK Pounds equivalent.
4) Biggest wildlife I saw: Water Buffalo.
5) Smallest wildlife I saw: A (very) small swarm of buzzing things which I happened to ride straight through the middle of.
6) Weirdest thing I saw: Probably the world's lamest mini-hurricane which basically consisted of a bit of wind pushing 1,000ish leaves around in a circle in the middle of nowhere. (This was quite impressive to watch though.)
7) Total number of towns I stayed at en-route: 9 (Including the first town I stayed at on the island complex.)
8) Total number of punctures I sustained: 2 (Both on the first day.)
9) Total number of wrong-turnings I took: 1
10) Location of toilet: To be provided to anyone who wants to visit Laos in the future. (You will need a boat to get to it though!)